While everybody’s fear is not fitting in with the rest, mine is to unconsciously become a replica of what everyone else is. We’re slowly becoming copies of each others; we unknowingly give in to what society views as the norm, and we give up on habits that we believe don’t match those norms, the box that society created with labels attached to its every corner has imprisoned us and we failed to realize that this box only exist in our minds. It is human nature to try and conform with society but to an extent, and then it becomes blind conformity that leads to the loss of our identity. The following are theories of why you shouldn’t conform to the rest.
1. It’s all in our heads, perfection is a myth.
Who decided that the most popular in school should be that cool kid who ditches classes and bully others? Us. And who decided that the one with a book in hand is a nerd? Also us. We created the labels, we weren’t born with the categorizations, you’re both students but with different interests, that’s all.
Start your own labels, find those who fit to your own category. Instead of bending and changing to satisfy a category that’s not yours.
2. Therefore the social risk, also a myth!
Social risk is the fear of not fitting in society, but then again we’re those who created the labeling and the ideals of what makes one a true fit or not, and thus we’re also able to change those labeling or better yet end them.
3. Different is good, similar is also good.
I’m not here to say that standing out feels special because not everyone has the uniqueness to stand out, adapting to an environment is no shame. Losing yourself in the process is what’s wrong. The fear of not belonging is common and natural but once you get to the point of accepting those differences, you’ll come to love who you are.
4. You choose your influencers!
Conforming with someone with a more social influence is another psychological act, one that many does unknowingly, we watch how influencers dress and we mimic their style believing that this way, we’re more likely to fit in. But then again, all those followers and all those likes, who made them? Us. Then why do we try so hard to follow someone else’s lead instead of creating our own?
5. There are no minority and majority, only different sets of minds.
The sense of belonging to the majority gives us satisfaction and boosts our self-esteem, whilst being with the minority boosts our insecurities, then again who decided that differences in opinions should divide us to groups? Also us. Then why can’t we accept that there is no us VS them? Only different sets of minds with different views, opinions and values.
Bottom line is, if you ever feel the need to change your behavior, do it with the conviction that this a way for you to become a better version of yourself, to evolve not to change, to never letting go of your true essence; because day by day you’ll start losing bits of who you are until there’s nothing left of you to be fixed.